Do you believe in love at first sight? As a hopeless romantic, I’ve always felt that it was possible to fall in love with someone you just met. But as I grew older, wiser and more educated, falling in love at first sight seemed more of a fantasy than reality. I mean how do you measure an instant connection with someone to true love?

According to all my neurological research and psychological training, there is actually a chemical reaction in your brain that makes you feel all warm and fuzzy feelings. You know those butterflies you get in the pit of your stomach while being around someone who makes you smile from head to toe? Those butterflies have a name to them called Dopamine and Seratonin. Dopamine and seratonin are chemicals released in the brain almost mimicking the effects of being high off drugs. Because of those chemicals, you feel this instant attachment and strong connection to someone every time you think of them and/see them. So the stronger the feeling with that person, the stronger feeling of love.

According to Psychology Today, a 2017 study by researchers at the University of Groningen revealed that love at first sight might be a positive illusion — meaning that you and your partner may think you fell in love immediately because of the way you feel about each other months or years later.

The study also revealed that most people who experienced love at first sight ended up in a long term relationship with that person, which is what lead the researchers to believe that love at first sight is a memory bias and not its own unique type of love, as many people might think.

Oh and let’s not forget about instant attraction. The more attracted we are to someone more likely to feel like love. What you might think of as love at first sight might actually be attraction at first sight.

Feelings of love at first sight might be a good indicator of a lasting relationship, but it’s not all you need. Building strong communication skills, understanding each others needs all play a huge role in a lasting relationship. So before being lead by the drug effects of dopamine and seratonin, make sure to take your time understanding who you are and what you want out of a relationship first. Remember, you attract what you are and not what you want.

xoxo

Dr. Hudson

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